Reflections on a Birthday...
So I am now officially 31...not just starting out my 30's....but fully committed! It seems like when you turn thirty you are just flirting with the idea of being in your thirties...testing the waters...trying it on for size; after all it wasn't that long ago that you were wearing your 20's with confidence...owning that decade...walking confidently as you were the upper class man and had it all figured out! Not the case when you turn thirty....you are the newbie...freshman...youngster in that club!
Not that you really have a choice...there is only one way to go once you enter thirty...you can't go back again and revisit those 20's and quite honestly...I wouldn't want to! I look back at my 20 year old self (or 21 year old self...as that is really when your 20's begin) and there is so much I would tell her! I was so lost at the beginning of that decade...confused about where my life was taking me and what my choices were....I was applying to medical school at that time (you can see how close I am to THAT now!) New in my marriage (yes, I got married REALLY young) and thought I had it all figured out! So misguided.....
At Thirty-one I am confident in where my life is going....maybe not confident in the HOW we will get there, but comfortable enough with life to know we WILL get there when we are supposed to! I have learned a lot about "spinning your wheels" and striving unnecessarily toward an outcome...that will come when it wants to, no matter how much effort you expend...enjoy the moments leading up to it.
I am confident in my relatively new role as a mother. I LOVE it, it is the best job! Yes it is frustrating, and I do have a quite destructive toddler...but I would not trade it for any amount of sleep, sanity, alone time, financial security, cleaner house on the planet! They are soooo worth it, and give my life a meaning beyond myself! There is nothing like a toddler to keep you living in today!
I am soooo much more confident in the strength of my relationship with my life partner (No it is not Dana...) Mikhail and I have been married for 10 years now and have weathered quite a few storms along the way! We by no means have it all figured out but have learned so much about marriage, life, love, each other while walking this journey together! No, it is far from perfect; but you get to a point in a relationship where there is not shock and horror as someone changes and you realize the person you married is not EXACTLY as he/she was when you said "I Do"....but that everyone changes and evolves...it is a natural part of life...accept those changes, talk about them if you have to, and realize that your partner feels the same way about you! It's what keeps life interesting!
31 is great! I feel more myself now than I ever have...and I imagine it just gets better! I had a low key birthday..no huge celebration...but Mason bought me flowers for the first time...and chocolates because he said "Mommy will share those" and Mikhail kept the kids occupied while I watched movies all day in my pajamas! The girlfriend giggled a lot and gave huge kisses, we all ate cake and went to bed...it was wonderful!
Not that you really have a choice...there is only one way to go once you enter thirty...you can't go back again and revisit those 20's and quite honestly...I wouldn't want to! I look back at my 20 year old self (or 21 year old self...as that is really when your 20's begin) and there is so much I would tell her! I was so lost at the beginning of that decade...confused about where my life was taking me and what my choices were....I was applying to medical school at that time (you can see how close I am to THAT now!) New in my marriage (yes, I got married REALLY young) and thought I had it all figured out! So misguided.....
At Thirty-one I am confident in where my life is going....maybe not confident in the HOW we will get there, but comfortable enough with life to know we WILL get there when we are supposed to! I have learned a lot about "spinning your wheels" and striving unnecessarily toward an outcome...that will come when it wants to, no matter how much effort you expend...enjoy the moments leading up to it.
I am confident in my relatively new role as a mother. I LOVE it, it is the best job! Yes it is frustrating, and I do have a quite destructive toddler...but I would not trade it for any amount of sleep, sanity, alone time, financial security, cleaner house on the planet! They are soooo worth it, and give my life a meaning beyond myself! There is nothing like a toddler to keep you living in today!
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| Flowers from my Toddler! |
I am soooo much more confident in the strength of my relationship with my life partner (No it is not Dana...) Mikhail and I have been married for 10 years now and have weathered quite a few storms along the way! We by no means have it all figured out but have learned so much about marriage, life, love, each other while walking this journey together! No, it is far from perfect; but you get to a point in a relationship where there is not shock and horror as someone changes and you realize the person you married is not EXACTLY as he/she was when you said "I Do"....but that everyone changes and evolves...it is a natural part of life...accept those changes, talk about them if you have to, and realize that your partner feels the same way about you! It's what keeps life interesting!
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| Lunch from the Hubby....Yum! |
31 is great! I feel more myself now than I ever have...and I imagine it just gets better! I had a low key birthday..no huge celebration...but Mason bought me flowers for the first time...and chocolates because he said "Mommy will share those" and Mikhail kept the kids occupied while I watched movies all day in my pajamas! The girlfriend giggled a lot and gave huge kisses, we all ate cake and went to bed...it was wonderful!